Okay, fall is halfway over and I cannot believe how fast time seems to be moving. I thought that if I were home a bit more and able to stay caught up on my priorities outside of the studio, time might slow down a bit. Boy, was I wrong! The one difference is that I do get to take more time to enjoy those impromptu moments without feeling guilty about doing something else. That is one way that I have adjusted and adapted to this new lifestyle.
I know that I keep talking about burnout and how to recover from it, but it seems to be a hot topic everywhere. There are so many elements that contribute to this and they are all significant and can contribute to creating healthier habits. I have been listening to some mindful master classes as personal development. The current class addresses stress and how it can lead to burnout. Listening to Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe’s breakdown is like taking a deep look into my past and how I got here. It was during one of these sessions that I realized that I set myself up for this years ago and I didn’t even realize what I was doing. As I have stated before, I have prided myself on being busy and active in a variety of ways. Activities, school, jobs, you name it, I have constantly been active. The problem was as I got older and more involved in my career, I thought that the more I could be involved in, the better off I would be. When I first moved to Florida, I had not officially worked as a dancer in two years. Imagine my excitement when I booked a show, was hired for a new small local dance company, hired to choreograph a musical for children, and teach regular dance classes? It was all I had ever wanted! And I had the love of my life by my side! Seriously, what more could a person in my industry want? Forget the fact that I would drive to teach classes between shows on a two show day, rehearse on my one off day, and have to miss multiple family activities because of my schedule. It was just the nature of the business! The show must go on, right?! Fast forward to having one job where I could teach and choreograph all under the same roof. Sounds easier, right? Except when you have groomed yourself to never accept help because it’s easier to figure it out when you don’t have to explain yourself. And no one else can find costumes to support your vision or choreograph or teach your class the way you do, so why accept any handouts? Just suck it up and get it done. But then, you feel like something is wrong, physically. Did you strain something during that contemporary combination? Did you sleep weird? No, what are we saying! You have too much to think about-you are barely sleeping at all! You can barely get in and out of your car without severe pain and so you finally go get it checked out. It turns out, you have severe tension in your back that is putting pressure on your rib cage. That’s right. You have stressed yourself out to the point that your body does not know what to do anymore. Breathing alone is painful. So strap on some KT tape and go about your business. Fortunately, I haven’t put myself in this particular position again. But I would be lying if I said I didn’t experience this overwhelming feeling again. It just manifested itself in a different manner. As a dancer, I was taught to always say yes and try not to ask questions. Fortunately, that model is changing and we are more accepting of dancers as individuals. But work was not always readily available so why would I turn it down? People in the entertainment industry often have to do random side hustles in between gigs to keep the lights turned on. Because of this, I think I got it in my head that I could never say no because I didn’t want to miss an opportunity. Guess what? After all of this time in the business, I finally had to. And not just for my own well-being, but for my families’. It’s November…No-vember. It is okay to say no to things to tend to your own priorities and well-being. My husband uses an analogy a lot and I think it is a perfect equation to live by. As a rule, we only have 100% of ourselves to dedicate to each day, sometimes less. That might be 50% to your job some days, less on others. And then maybe 10% to your personal priorities. And 40% to your family or maybe friends. But whatever the amount, you can never give more than 100%. If you try to give everything to everyone or everything, there will be nothing left for you. And if you don’t take care of yourself first, everything else will fail. Be well dancing mommas! Don’t forget to take care of you. I am so very thankful and blessed.
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AuthorNikki Allred Boyd (Dancer, Choreographer, Mom). Archives
March 2024
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